AscensionRobo

You're at the final test. To be honest, you don't really want to jump do you? <img src="Hermes8.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Nope]] [[You jump anyways]]

<img src="Dead.png" width="326" height="348" alt="Two foxes"> You really screwed up. Your wings haven't been working for 15 years, why would they work now? Well crap, now you've fallen and died. Good job, dingus. (if: $class is 2)[Maybe you shouldn't have gone to class that much. When's the last time class has helped?] (else:)[(if: $batteries > 0)[You probably could have looked for more batteries...](else:)[I hear batteries are good for your digestive system.]]

You know what, you're about to die anyways. Why not try playing that game Arty gave you again...You try to take out the console and fumble with it a little. Suddenly the batteries pop out. What do you do? <img src="batteries.jpg" width="200" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> (set: $console to false) [[Grab the batteries out of the air]] [[Let them fall]]

You did it! Your wings are working! Time to go to Yggdrasil! [[Continue to Yggdrasil]]

JUST KIDDING. You're really dense, aren't you. Your wings haven't been working for 15 years, why would they work now? Well crap, now you've fallen and died. Good job, dingus.

<img src="Hermes1.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> *...Who are you? You have to be the most screwed up angel I have ever laid eyes on. Are you sure he's not a robot or something? Erm...this is Hermes, chief. We don't really know where he came from. One day, he just randomly fell out of the sky and landed here. We kind of guessed he was sent down here from our superiors up in Yggdrasil. In any case, his time is up. It's been 15 years since he's arrived and his wings haven't been able to take him even 10 feet off the ground. But he has wings! He has to be an angel. At this point, we're convinced that he's just a terrible person, so his flight has failed to manifest. In any case, he has to take the test now. So you're sure he's not a robot. Of course not. Why would a robot be here anyways. And he has wings! Robots don't have wings! You sure he has what it takes to fly up to Yggdrasil? Who knows. We shouldn't be that worried though. When's the last time an angel has failed the flight test anyways. 2000 years ago? If he fails, you know what will happen right? ...He'll fall and die. Look, it's fine, chief. If he can't make it to Yggdrasil on his own, that just means he belongs in Hell anyways. Well, whatever. Just send this...whatever this is...back to flight academy. He has 3 days* (set: $overalls to false)(set: $name to false)(set: $book to 0)(set: $class to 0)(set: $sleep to false)(set: $remote to false)(set: $calculator to false)(set: $console to false)(set: $batteries to 0)(set: $interject to false)(set: $staff to false)(set: $taste to false) [[Interject]] [[Go back to flight school->Hermes]]

(if: $interject is true)[ You may have been completely ignored, but at least you still have your dignity. Good stuff. Maybe you have what it takes to complete this game...er...learn how to fly after all.] (else:)[ You have three days left before you plummet to your doom and you decide to go out without even getting a word in? How do you expect to progress in this game...er...learn how to fly with that attitude?] Anyways, you're back at flight school. You should probably head to class. You only have three days. <img src="school.jpg" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Head to class]]

boolean overalls - interaction w/ teacher boolean Arty - learn name from kid boolean Dignity - interjection variable book - run away from teacher for the first time variable class - have you gone to class boolean sleep - leave kid sleeping boolean remote - remote boolean calculator - calculator

You start to protest. The two angels ignore you anyways and you are taken back to flight school. (set: $interject to true) [[Continue->Hermes]]

You made it. It looks like the principal wants to talk to you. He looks kind of upset. What are you going to do? <img src="Hermes2.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> (set: $book to 0) [[Go talk to the principal->Go talk to the teacher]] [[Turn around and book it]]

Principal: (if: $book is 1)[ *Hold it there, Hermes. You're not trying to run off are you? You still have a flight test you need to prepare for.* ] *I really don't know what to say. It's been almost 15 years and you still don't know how to fly. We've done everything! Standard wing fitness training, flight simulators, hell, we even tried zen meditation. NOTHING WORKS. Sorry, but we're be sending you back to elementary flight class. Yeah, the one for 5 year olds. This is a last ditch effort. Please, PLEASE, try to learn something. ANYTHING! If you end up being the first one to fail in the past two millenia, I'll have to quit my job and go work as a potato farmer or something. Don't let that happen. I look terrible in overalls.* <img src="Hermes3.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Tell the principal you think he'd look great in overalls.->Tell your teacher you think he'd look great in overalls.]] [[Ignore that statement and go to your new class]]

You try to run, but the principal just grabs you and drags you back. It was a valiant effort though, good try. (set: $book += 1) [[Talk to the principal anyways->Go talk to the teacher]]

<img src="Hermes4.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> Principal: *No. Now go to class and prevent this terrible fate from happening.* Now why would you say that? Of course the principal would look terrible in overalls. There really isn't any use lying to him. (set: $overalls to true) [[Go to your new class->Ignore that statement and go to your new class]]

<img src="Hermes5.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> As you arrive at the entrance to your classroom, you notice a young angel boy nonchalantly walking out of the classroom with his backpack. Strange, isn't it? Class is about to start but it looks like this kid is already ready to leave school for the day. What should you do? (set: $class to 0) [[Ask the kid why he's leaving]] [[Hurry to class before you're late]]

You ask the kid why he's leaving. He smiles widely at you. Kid: *I'm going to go play video games!* <img src="Hermes6.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> How do you respond? [[What the crap?]] [[Can I come too?]] [[Um, have fun with that, I'm going to class->Hurry to class before you're late]]

You walk into class. Everyone's tiny! Even the chairs are small. Thankfully, for some reason you haven't grown an inch in the past 15 years. Must be a personality flaw. You take a seat in the middle of the classroom. It seems like the elementary teacher is going over simple addition. Seriously? How is this even remotely related to flying? She writes down a problem on the board and asks you to go up and answer it. (set: $class += 1) You go up and look at the problem. "1+1=" <img src="Chalkboard.jpg" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[2]] [[1->wow]] [[11->wow]] [[73->wow]]

The kid looks at you funny. Kid: *What's a crap? Anyways, I don't want to go to class, and I don't need to either. I got this wholeeee thing figured out. We don't really need to go through all this school stuff. Sooner or later, we'll figure out how to fly. It's all in here* He points towards his stomach, and you can only assume he's trying to point at his heart. Kid: *I'm just going to play video games in the meantime. You want to come?* [[Say yes and follow him->Can I come too?]] [[Say no and go to class->Hurry to class before you're late]]

The kid shrugs. Kid: *Sure...you're not trying to kidnap me, are you?* Your eyebrow twitches. *Hahaha, just kidding. I only brought one console though, but that's fine. I can watch you play! I've already beaten this game tons of times. My name's Arty by the way. Let's go!* (set: $name to true) Arty leads you to a secluded hallway in the school. He gives you his game console and watches intently as you begin playing. <img src="Hermes7.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Level 1]]

You got the question correct. Honestly, it's doubtful that anyone could have gotten that question wrong. Very doubtful. The rest of the day proceeds in a similar fashion, with the teacher giving trivial problems that had little to do with flying. By the end of the day, you have learned nothing. Probably could have expected that when you decided to go to a class meant for 5 year olds. You return home. [[The next day]]

<img src="Dumb.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> Honestly, I have no idea how you could have gotten this problem wrong. This is sad. Very, very sad. I'm sorry, but because you got that question wrong, you died on the spot. Immediately. There is no redemption for what has just transpired. It takes a special kind of person to get 1+1 wrong. Just because of that, you have to start all the way back at the beginning. Have fun reading the intro dialogue again. [[Shame on you->Start]]

You start off in a dungeon. After killing several threatening looking pixies, you make it to the first boss. Good job! You have three weapons that you can choose from. Which do you use? [[Spear]] <img src="Spear.jpg" width="150" height="90" alt="Two foxes"> [[Sword]] <img src="sword.png" width="150" height="90" alt="Two foxes"> [[Magical Stick of Power and Integrity]] <img src="stick.png" width="150" height="90" alt="Two foxes">

You choose the spear and get pooped on (not literally) by the first boss. [[Quickly use the magical stick of power before it's too late->Magical Stick of Power and Integrity]] [[Proceed to get pooped on (still not literally) by the boss]]

You choose the sword and get pooped on (not literally) by the boss. [[Quickly use the magical stick of power before it's too late->Magical Stick of Power and Integrity]] [[Proceed to get pooped on (still not literally) by the boss]]

You wack the boss with the Magical Stick of Power and Integrity and it disintegrates immediately. Arty: *Wow, good job. Not many people know to use the Magical Stick of Power and Integrity immediately. You're pretty good at this aren't you?* [[Level 2]] [[This game is pretty dumb.]]

Arty: *Wow...you suck at this, don't you? That's amazing! I've actually never seen someone so bad at video games. You should probably take my game console. You're gonna need a lot of practice...* (set: $console to true) Arty gives you the console and starts to leave. <img src="console.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> Arty: *Well, good luck! I don't think I can watch you while you're so bad at this game. My eyes might actually burn out of their sockets. See you later!* [[The next day]]

You make your way through the second level, defeating all the small woodland creatures that stand in your way. At the end of the level, an old man approaches and asks you a riddle: <img src="roshi.jpg" width="300" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> *What appears once in a minute, twice in a moment, and never in a thousand years?* [[Use the Magical Stick of Power and Integrity]]<img src="stick.png" width="150" height="90" alt="Two foxes"> [[M]] [[Run away in fear]]

You wack the old man with the Magical Stick of Power and Integrity and he disintegrates immediately. Good job! Arty: *Wow, I've never seen anyone so good at this game before! No one ever thinks to use the Magical Stick twice! You're super good. A bit too good. Like a "You're so good that you might ruin the plot of a well thought-out game" kind of good.* Arty glances off into the distance for a split second before turning back to you as if nothing happened. [[Level 3]] [[This game is pretty dumb.]]

You get the answer right, but the old man proceeds to beat you with his cane anyways. <img src="roshi2.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Use the Magical Stick of Power and Integrity]] [[You get the urge to continue being beaten by this old man->Proceed to get pooped on (still not literally) by the boss]]

You try to run away, but the old man chases you down and beats you with his cane. <img src="roshi2.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Use the Magical Stick of Power and Integrity]] [[You get the urge to continue being beaten by this old man->Proceed to get pooped on (still not literally) by the boss]]

Oh, looks like they pushed you off anyways. [[Fall->You jump anyways]]

You're falling! What should you do??? [[Use your wings]] (if: $console is true)[ [[Screw this, you're not gonna fly. Play video games instead->Play video games]]<img src="console.png" width="150" height="90" alt="Two foxes"> ] (if: $remote is true)[ [[Play around with the sick remote you got]]<img src="remote.jpg" width="100" height="150" alt="Two foxes"> ] (if: $calculator is true)[ [[Calculate stuff with your calculator?]] <img src="calculator.png" width="100" height="150" alt="Two foxes"> ] (if: $batteries is 3)[ [[Fly]] ]

Well, now you have batteries. What are you going to do with them? [[Put them back in the game and play!]] [[You've always wondered what batteries tasted like. You eat them]]

Unfortunately, you can't really use electronics in the air without batteries. I can't imagine how you could have forgotten that. Now you have a useless game console and are plummeting to your doom. What do you do? [[Just use your wings!]]

You put the batteries in and proceed to play. Unfortunately, you show no improvement since the last time you complete the game. Oh well. You look down and you still have a ways to go. What do you do? [[Just use your wings!]] [[Take the batteries out and eat them, just for kicks->You've always wondered what batteries tasted like. You eat them]]

You're a freak, you know that? Who the hell eats batteries. How does that even work? Aren't they too hard for your teeth or something? Anyways, you eat the batteries, and suddenly, you experience a weird rumbling in your stomach. (set: $batteries += 1) [[Continue falling->You jump anyways]]

Principal: *So how was your first day in class? I'm sure you're learning so much about flying, right? I mean, I'm sure you learned something, right?* The principal seems to be losing confidence the more he talks. <img src="Hermes4.png" width="250" height="150" alt="Two foxes"> *I mean, I know it's an entry level class, but it's informative, right?.* You continue listening as the principal loses it out of fear of being fired. *Please tell me you're learning. I love this job. It has a good salary and so many benefits. I don't have to deal with spuds or dirt or anything. No no no, I can't go back to potato farming. You don't know what they did to me there. I don't want to wear overalls...* You're a bit unnerved seeing your principal break down, but you have to respond anyways. (if: $class is 1)[ [[Say class was a joke]] [[Say class was informative]] ] (else:)[[[You lie and laugh nervously because you skipped class->Say class was informative]] [[Feeling guilty, you tell the teacher that you skipped]] ]

You try to walk past him, but the principal just grabs you and drags you back again. (if: $book is 1)[Principal: *Hermes, why do you keep on running away? I just need to talk to you*] (else:)[Principal: *Hold it right there Hermes, I just want to have a word with you.* ](set: $book += 1) [[Talk to the principal]]

It's the next day. Once again, you bump into your principal. He looks eager to talk to you... <img src="Hermes2.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Talk to the principal]] [[Pretend nothing happened and walk away quickly]]

Principal: *Good, good, I'm glad you're learning. You're the only one who can save me from the potato farm Hermes.* <img src="Hermes3.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Proceed to the classroom]]

The principal is so caught up in his own self-pity that he is unable to process what you just said. Principal: *Good, good, I'm glad you're learning. You're the only one who can save me from the potato farm Hermes.* <img src="Hermes3.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Proceed to the classroom]]

Hearing this, the principal curls up in a fetal position and starts rocking back and forth on the ground. You don't really know what to do, so you leave him there. [[Proceed to the classroom]]

You arrive again at the entrance to your classroom, and you notice (if: $name is true)[Arty](else:)[that same angel kid] once again walking away from the classroom. Where's he going? <img src="Hermes5.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Follow him]] [[Go to class instead]]

You decide to follow (if: $name is true)[Arty](else:)[the angel kid]. He turns around and notices you. (if: $name is true)[Arty: *Oh hey, it's you again! I'm skipping class today! You wanna come?*](else:)[Kid: *Are you following me?* He looks at you suspiciously. *You're not a kidnapper are you?* Your eyebrow twitches. *Hahaha, just kidding. I'm Arty and I'm skipping class today! You wanna come?*(set: $name to true)] You're thrown off by Arty's directness, but you make a quick recovery. [[Tell him he should get to class]] [[Say yes]] [[Say no and go to class->Go to class instead]]

You walk into class. (if: $class is 1)[Everything that you learn today is as stupidly easy as the last class, and you wonder why you even bothered coming to class.](if: $class is 0)[Everything in this class is stupidly easy. You probably should have expected as much from an intruductory level class meant for 5 year olds.] Maybe you should have followed (if: $name is true)[Arty](else:)[that angel kid] instead. You leave class feeling disappointed in yourself for making such a poor decision. Who willingly goes to class anyways? (set: $class += 1) [[The next day->Day 2]]

Arty: *No.* There's an awkward silence between the two of you for a solid 2 minutes. Suddenly Arty starts laughing. Arty: *Haha, what are you, my mom? Man, you're weird.* With that, he walks away. [[Go to class->Go to class instead]]

Arty: *Alright, let's go!* He brings you to an empty stairwell and pulls out something rather large from his backpack. Upon closer inspection, it appears to be a television. <img src="tv.jpg" width="300" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Ask Arty why he has a television in his backpack]] [[Pretend like this isn't weird and roll with it]]

It's the last day. As you pass by the principal today, he doesn't stop you. Instead, you can hear him mumbling some incoherent nonsense about spuds. <img src="Hermes4.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Head to the classroom]]

Arty: *To watch television* Well, no arguing with that logic. He pulls out a remote from his backpack as well and turns to you. Arty: *You wanna watch anything?* [[The nature channel]] [[The cooking channel]] [[Cartoons!!!]] [[The Robots Suck channel]]

You pretend this isn't weird and roll with it. Good on you. Arty takes out a remote from his backpack and flips to a cartoon channel. [[Cartoons!!!]]

It's the nature channel! You spend the entire time watching graphic images from the cruel natural world for the rest of the day. Maybe this wasn't so great of an idea. Or maybe it was. Who knows, maybe you're into that kind of thing. <img src="nature.jpg" width="300" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> Arty: *Wow, that was disturbing. Cool! Well, I'm gonna leave now. Bye!" He leaves. Bye. [[The next day ->Day 2]]

It's the cooking channel! Some show called "Molecular Gastronomy with Alice" is currently playing. The show seems more like a chemistry lesson than a cooking show. Who knew cooking was so complicated. Meanwhile, Arty seems to have fallen asleep. [[Leave without waking him up]] [[Wake him up]]

You switch to the Robots Suck channel. For some reason, watching this channel pisses you off. You punch the television. The screen shatters. Arty: *Oh...well, I guess I won't be needing this.* He takes the television and chucks it out a nearby window. *Here, I guess you can have the remote* (set: $remote to true) <img src="remote.jpg" width="200" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> After giving you the remote, Arty leaves. [[The next day->Day 2]]

Arty: *Aw man. Well, it's okay, I would have done the same thing too. I guess I won't be needing this.* He takes the television and chucks it out a nearby window. *Here, I guess you can have the remote* (set: $remote to true) After giving you the remote, Arty leaves. [[The next day->Day 2]]

You let it live and continue watching television. What a mundane turn of events. You watch until classes end for the day. Arty packs up his television. Arty: *Well, that was fun. Bye!* He leaves [[The next day->Day 2]]

Wow, I can't believe you just left a sleeping kid all on his own. Oh well, he'll probably be fine. (set: $sleep to true) [[The next day->Day 2]]

You tap on Arty, and he jerks awake. In his movements, he kicks his television screen, breaking it. Arty: *Woops. Well, I guess I won't be needing this.* He takes the television and chucks it out a nearby window. *Here, I guess you can have the remote* (set: $remote to true) <img src="remote.jpg" width="200" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> After giving you the remote, Arty leaves. [[The next day->Day 2]]

You head to the classroom and once again see (if:$name is true)[Arty](else:)[that same angel kid] leaving the room. (if: $name is false)[At this point, one MIGHT expect that after going to so many useless classes, it might be a good idea to talk to this kid at least once. Whatever floats your boat though.] <img src="Hermes5.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Talk to him->Talk to the him]] [[Go to class]]

You ended up in class. The teacher teaches subjects that don't seem very pertinent to flying. What a way to spend your last day before the test. Truly an excellent decision to be sure. [[Test]]

You notice that (if: $name is true)[Arty](else:)[the kid] looks a bit sullen. (if:$name is true)[Arty](else:)[Kid]: *Turns out, if you skip class too many times, you get suspended. Who would have known??? Oh well, I guess I won't be needing this anymore* He chucks his calculator and walks away. [[Pick up the calculator]] [[Don't pick it up]]

You pick up the calculator. Sick. (set: $calculator to true) <img src="calculator.png" width="200" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[Go to class]]

You don't pick up the calculator for some reason and it spontaneously combusts. Oh well, I guess you should go to class. [[Go to class]]

You press the buttons on the remote. It's surprisingly entertaining. You start pressing the buttons so vigorously that the batteries pop out. What do you do? (set: $remote to false) <img src="batteries.jpg" width="200" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[You've always wondered what batteries tasted like. You eat them]] [[Ignore them and continue falling I guess->You jump anyways]]

You start doing math in the air. Nerd. Suddenly the batteries pop out of your calculator. What do you do? (set: $calculator to false) <img src="batteries.jpg" width="200" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> [[You've always wondered what batteries tasted like. You eat them]] [[Forget about them and continue falling ->You jump anyways]]

You fly past Yggdrasil. Looking at it from a distance, it looks super boring. You fly even higher and reach a strange, futuristic island. As you touch down, a robot greets you. Robot: *Congratulations, young protagonist. You have made it to the Land of the Robots. It must have been difficult for you, being alone down there in the land of angels. The way that they think of flying...it's different from us. But now you have arrived. You have good taste, you've discovered the way of explosions. In this land, you are surrounded by fellow luminaries. Welcome. You have ascended.* <img src="ascension.png" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> END

In this level, you meet a young arch-wizard named Megumin. Her determination and drive to master her craft, explosion magic, capture your heart. <img src="megumin.jpg" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> You embark upon a grand adventure with her, travelling throughout the land, slaying monsters and sharing incredible triumphs together (all in a mere 45 minutes!). With Megumin, you reach the final boss, the terrible warlock Papples. Papples: *Wahaha, you don't stand a chance against the all-mighty Papples!* He fires a powerful magical attack at you. [[It seems as if you are done for when suddenly...]]

Arty: *What? You think my game is dumb? Man, some people just don't understand true art. Oh well, I'll just go play by myself.* He takes his console and leaves. You feel like you missed an important opportunity, but the thought quickly escapes your mind. After all, there's no way you'd be stupid enough to believe that playing video games would help you fly. [[The next day]]

Megumin pushes you out of the way of the attack, taking the full brunt of the attack. You rush to her side. Megumin: *I...I don't think I'll be able to make it. You must be the one to finish our journey. Defeat Papples...for my sake. These moments that we've shared together...I wish that I could cherish them forever...but my time is up. Please do not forget me. Do not forget...the way of...explosion.* <img src="megumin2.jpg" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> Her body begins to fade. Soon, all that is left is her magical essence. A single tear escapes your eye in real life. You are suddenly overtaken by grief and cry out: *I hate you Papples!* You take the essence and the power of explosion magic surges through you. [[Fire an explosion spell at Papples]] [[Use the Magical Stick of Power and Integrity that conveniently appeared out of nowhere ->Magical Stick of Power and Integrity]] <img src="stick.png" width="150" height="90" alt="Two foxes">

You fire the spell, defeating Papples. You can't help but wipe the tears flowing from your eyes, knowing that your victory was only made possible through Megumin's sacrifice. The end credits scroll up on the screen of the console. You turn around and see Arty sobbing off in a corner. Arty: *Man, everytime I play "Konosuba 9", I can't help but cry. Thanks for playing with me. I really enjoyed it. Here, take my console as a memento of this precious moment. In fact, take this too.* He hands you the game console and what looks like a wizard's staff. There's a mysterious looking red stone attached to the end of it. <img src="console.png" width="250" height="150" alt="Two foxes"><img src="staff.jpg" width="150" height="350" alt="Two foxes"> Arty: *Explosion!!! It's from Megumin. She would want you to have it.* He starts sobbing again and walks off, leaving you with the console and the staff. (set: $console to true)(set: $staff to true) [[The next day]]

It's cartoons!!! Arty seems to be incredibly engrossed in the cartoon that's on right now. It seems to be about some kind of children's card game. <img src="cardgames.png" width="400" height="240" alt="Two foxes"> One of the characters finishes spouting something about a "magic card" that allows you to draw two new cards when Arty turns to you. Arty: *Man, this show is pretty sick, don't you think? What do you think is your favorite part?* [[The power of friendship!]] [[Card games are cool!]] [[This show is lame]]

Arty: *Wow, what a boring answer. Didn't know you were a cliche kind of guy. You've got some pretty shit taste, don't you.* He shakes his head in disapproval. He then gets up and grabs his television. Arty: *You don't deserve to share this screen with me. Begone!* He then walks away. You're left wondering how your judgement could have been so wrong. Cliches can't be that bad, can they? [[The next day ->Day 2]]

Arty: *I know right? You know what, you have some great taste. You've passed the Good Taste Test. Take this!* He takes out a blue crystal from his pocket. <img src="taste.jpg" width="200" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> Arty: *I don't really know what this is, but I picked it up from the ground earlier. Pretty sick right? I call it "The Stone of Good Taste". Only someone with good taste like you could understand it's true value!* Arty tosses you the crystal and strikes a pose. Unfortunately it seems as if he struck it too hard, and he trips, falling onto his television and breaking it. Arty: *Owowowowow. Woops, looks like I broke my TV.* He tosses it out a window. Arty: *You can take this too I guess.* He hands you the now useless television remote and walks away. <img src="remote.jpg" width="200" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> (set: $remote to true)(set: $taste to true) [[The next day->Day 2]]

Arty: *No, you're lame.* He grabs his television and leaves, mumbling something about shit taste. You begin to regret your decision. How could you have insulted such a magnificent show? [[The next day->Day 2]]

You've made it to Yggdrasil, the floating angel city. As you touch down, an angel comes to welcome you. Angel: *Congratulations! You made it to Yggdrasil! Well, bye.* The angel leaves. Well, that was a bit anti-climactic. No prize? No tour? The city doesn't even look that impressive! What was the point of learning how to fly? You leave the scene feeling like you missed the true ending to your story. (if: $staff is false)[You might want to try playing more video games. I've heard that you can learn a lot from those...](if: $taste is false)[Maybe you want to reconsider your choice in television shows...]

There's something glowing in your pocket! You reach in and pull out the staff that Arty gave you (that somehow managed to fit in your pocket) and the Stone of Good Taste. <img src="staff.jpg" width="150" height="350" alt="Two foxes"><img src="taste.jpg" width="200" height="300" alt="Two foxes"> As you hold these two items, a strange power suddenly surges through you. You feel the rockets grow even more powerful as they shoot you higher into the sky. Who knew that the combination of explosions and good taste could be so powerful! [[Fly super high]]

A strange rumbling starts up in your stomach. Must have been the batteries. Suddenly, rockets apear where your feet should be and you shoot up into the sky. How convenient! Looks like eating the batteries worked out somehow. [[Continue to Yggdrasil->Continue to Yggdrasil 2]] (if: $staff is true)[(if: $taste is true)[ [[Something glows in your pocket]] ]]